The Process Versus The Product


God fears His creations the most.


One of my biggest fears as a content creator is not having content to create. It's scary to run out of ideas. It's scary to not have subject matter to combine with ideas. It's scary to not have accessibility to the tools necessary to make these ideas come to life.

It really stresses me out when I lack one of the three key items and lately, I think I've been creatively frustrated because of that. I've had back-to-back lookbooks to shoot on very tight schedules but I've been lacking the creativity to produce the content I've been aiming for. This has resulted to having to reshoot the same looks over and over again because I'm not hitting the right notes.


Me fighting through these creative blocks is a result of me fighting against time. I feel rushed and I keep forcing myself to have things mentally prepared for myself to stay organized for our shoots but things aren't coming together.
I blame school a lot of this; for taking up my energy, focus and time that was really meant to be dedicated to Polydeux. However, I also really blame myself for having such high expectations. I know I don't want to settle and I really love capitalizing on progression because of how passionate I am about this craft. It even took me a draft or two just to write this post, which is so odd to me since I usually can crack out posts in one sitting.


Things just haven't been clicking with me. That frustrates me because I don't want to take breaks and on top of that, I hate wasting money (re: frugal Asian parents). With time being money, I just don't want to wait for ideas to come to me.


There are two mantras I really stick by:
One, I always try to shoot a look better than my last. The only competition there is is myself.
Two, in my small business management class, I learned that businesses start working on a new campaign as soon as they've launched one. They have to be creating content ahead of the content they're already working on in order to keep the moment and stay relative and that's something I always aim to do.


Through this mental block, I've learned that sometimes fighting your way through it isn't the answer, but removing yourself entirely is.
The moment what you love to do starts to feel like work is the moment when you need to detach yourself completely from it. Take a break to rehash and refresh yourself and your thoughts.


Coat and skirt via Zaful


Your relationship with your career is as important as your relationship with your significant other. Sometimes you can't spend every single minute with him or her and you shouldn't with your job as much as you love it.
Distance makes the heart grow fonder.


Youtube | Facebook | Twitter | Lookbook | Instagram | Bloglovin

Photography by Justin Quebral